I felt so magical with my arms full of flowers, it was like my whole heart was blossoming.
“Cafe Memory” oil on canvas, 22 × 20 inches
“Cafe Memory” is my attempt to use paint to describe a beautiful memory I have carried with me for decades. The scene is mostly invented, because memory and imagination have become entangled over the years. But the spirit is authentic, and as vivid as the night it happened.
The moon was full…and so was my heart (painting detail)
I allowed this painting to evolve very slowly over time, and there are many layers of paint on this canvas. I had a good time messing around, moving shapes here and there, painting over things, and bringing them back in new ways. I’m happy with how it has turned out. It's not so much that it's "finished,” but rather that I'm ready to let it be and move on with new things.
This particular memory is a romantic date over 24 years ago. I think it was the spring of 2001, when I was 20 years old. There was a really cool cafe-bookstore near Mount Holyoke College in Massachusetts, not far from Hampshire College where I was enrolled. The cafe was open very late into the night, and my boyfriend Ian and I had made plans to meet there. We both liked browsing in book stores and drinking tea.
My whole heart was blossoming… (painting detail)
There was a bus from my college to Mount Holyoke, free for students. On my way to the bus stop, I stopped at a local florist and bought a HUGE bouquet, lilies of every color of the rainbow. I held them in my arms as I rode the bus, filled with joyful anticipation.
I felt so magical with my arms full of flowers, it was like my whole heart was blossoming.
When I entered the dark cafe, I felt like I was bringing light and magic and color into the space, and that all the heads were turning with surprise and happiness to see the beautiful glowing flowers in my arms.
And in my memory my boyfriend’s face reflected that radiance and joy and love back to me.
He was surprised! (oil painting detail)
It felt so wonderful to bring him this gift, a gift of love.
Photo from around that time…summer of 2000? Ian and me, ages 25 and 19, at a music concert. (P.S. We are still together.)